We are a ½ block from the beach, and a few opportunistic people have snuck into our lot—sometimes for the entire weekend! Our parking lot is tight; only one car per apartment is allowed: Rare exceptions. We have a few that think the rules don’t apply to them, and have boldly told me such. Idiots, they have made enemies among their own neighbors, and trust me, ‘blunt’ words have been exchanged.
Most days, we keep a casual eye out the window, and generally a few words will encourage people to leave, however, come big events such as the town’s fireworks, and Whoa! Everyone is entitled to use our lot.
Visitors comes from miles away to see the fireworks on the beach. Great! Bring the family, but if you think that you can come to town, 20 minutes before they are scheduled to begin, and find a parking space, lots of luck! If you think you can sneak into any parking lot, forgedaboudit! We are on to your sneaky tactics and lies!
Days before the event, a few tenants were smart and began negotiating for spaces, offering to park their cars on the street so that their friends could park in the lot. A few were even smarter and told their friends to park at the train station and shuttled them to the beach. Negotiations are welcomed and honored.
About two hours before show time, I grabbed a bottle of cold water, pack of smokes and my trusty cell phone, with camera, and headed down to the parking lot. A few tenants laughed until they saw what I was up against, and they even helped me wave off those who tried to sneak into the lot.
By 9 a.m. the parking in town was so bad, 5 blocks up from the boardwalk were fully loaded with cars. I was keeping an eye out on the street, so that I could get my car out of the lot and onto the curb. Finally, I spotted a car, right next to my driveway leaving. I grabbed my keys, flew down a flight of stairs, around the yard, into my car, gunned it into reverse, and managed to cut off a truck who was aiming for the same spot. I only know I cut off a truck because I was commended by the neighbor who saw me fly. He was proud of me! One more spot in the lot for us!
Rude Dude #1, pulled straight into the lot, when I yelled he stated: “I’m here to pick up my friend.”
Me: “Really, because he left and hour ago with my brother-in-law for the boardwalk. They made those plans DAYS ago.” My cell phone is now in hand: “I’ll call him for you, but you still must park elsewhere.”
Rude Dude #1, very nasty: “You gotta wait for my ‘crippled’ wife to get out of the car.”
Me, thinking, now you are playing the handicapped card, my brother-in-law is handicapped, and those two women standing with me; one is handicapped, the other has a handicapped husband. Don’t play that card with us! He did not have a handicapped placard in his windshield or a special license plate: We do!
Wife jumps out, Rude Dude leaves rubber backing out.
The tenants who were just chatting with me, are now part of the ‘defend the parking lot’ team.
Rude Dude #2, yanks his truck into the lot heading for an empty space, we yelled, and he shouted back: “Hey, I’m just turning around.”
Bull! You didn’t just pull onto the driveway, stop, and crank your head around to back up. You were clearly gunning for the empty spaces in the back.
Tenants are now pointing out all the cars slowly driving by, heads hanging out the car window, eyeballing the empty spots, then abruptly driving away when they spot me shaking my head. My buddies can’t believe the boldness of all the idiots who claim to be just ‘turning around’ as they whip their cars into the lot. And trust me, there were a good dozen who tried that maneuver!
Rude Dude #3: “My buddy lives here, he said I could park here.”
Me: “Really, that buddy moved out months ago.”
Stare down, he had no answer, he left.
One tenant asked if his daughter could park here, and we gave permission. However, the daughter AND the boyfriend pulled up in separate cars! We gave permission for ONE car, and this woman has been here often enough to know the shortage of spaces, she is not blonde, but plays the part well. They even tried telling me that they would only be 15 minutes!? I don’t know how they tell time on their planet, but 6 kids take way more than 15 minutes to drop off and pick up, PLUS watch fireworks. Aaargh! They left.
Finally, a man managed to squeeze his motorcycle between a car and the driveway apron, and his teenage daughter was on the back, not really safe for the bike. So I looked at my friends, and then offered him a narrow spot between the dumpster and sidewalk. He thanked me and moved his bike. Hey, I owned a motorcycle back in the day, then it turned out that his son lives here, and we had a really nice chat. I let him know that from now on, that he could use this spot whenever he comes to visit. Maybe his son will start being nicer to me. Yeah, dream on.
The only fireworks I saw this year were over the rooftop, viewed from the parking lot. It was hot, I felt grungy and my feet hurt from standing for two hours, but I was repeatedly thanked by a few tenants who were so grateful for my efforts.
It’s an odd job being an on-site manager, this customer service is a little hard to explain on a resume.
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