Do Not Play the Handicapped Card with Me!

I am not handicapped, but I do have a Motor Vehicle Handicapped tag hanging from my rear view mirror. It is not for me, but for a family member.

From childhood I learned all too well how much planning goes into choosing a restaurant, because of easy access; just how cold it is pushing a wheelchair up a handicapped ramp in the rain; how complicated and difficult stairs can be in snow or even after dark because they are hard to see.

And don’t even get me started on those prima donnas who think they can park in a handicapped space just because they are too special and too lazy to walk a few car lengths. I have embarrassed a few women in stiletto heels using a handicapped spot while they run to the ATM.

I know just how damn rude, or ignorant, employees at the movie theatre can be, refusing my request to use the side door that is in their view, but made my brother-in-law, hobbling with a walker, trudge all the way up to the main door, then the back down the entire length of the foyer, past the side door, then into the theatre. Yeah, I left from that side door, they won't have my business again.

Then, a handicapped tenant flipped the tables on me…

We had nasty snow storm: I offered to jockey his car around, several times: to get it off the street, park it in the lot, or move to the other side of the street because of the plows. All offers were refused. I kept an eye out, made sure the stairs and walkways were cleared, sanded, etc. But people, we had 2-3 inches of snow, and lots of ice! We live on the ocean, lots of moisture, and lots of ice.

One of the tenants took it on himself to spend the afternoon chopping and shoveling the ice in the driveway. The parking lot has a rise and the bottom end is slightly rounded, a hump, we clear and salt it, but snow melts, forms ice and that’s it. Be careful.

I looked down and there is the tenant, with crutches walking around this lot, chatting up the dude who is shoveling. He was out there, strolling up and down a good 30 minutes.

I spotted a plow working the building next door, ran down and asked if he could clear the mountain of snow at the end of our parking lot, so the garbage truck could get into our lot and empty the dumpster. (Overflowing dumpsters are ugly sights indeed.)

As his car was already idling alongside that mountain of snow that the plow was heading for, I asked the tenant to please move his car off the street and into the lot.

Wow! Nasty, angry and vulgar!

How dare I ask him: He ONLY came down here to make sure his car started! And now I want him to walk through all this ice? And now he is sick. He has the flu!

Duh? You walked down two flights of stairs, down the sidewalk, over the ice, through clumps of snow and through the slush and ice in the street, just to start your car. You have been strolling around a parking lot full of ice. You have been outside 30 minutes and JUST NOW you have the FLU?!

I pointed out the plow heading our way. I offered to move his car for him.

More @#$@#%@#% drama. He now has a fever.

He agreed to move his car, but as he is walking down the parking lot, loudly protesting his handicap, his illness, the ice, and while my back was turned, he fell.

As I rushed to help, I thought it was odd that I didn’t hear a cry of, “OMG!” or even hear a thump. As I walked alongside him to the sidewalk, I heard all about his illness and, “Don’t stand too close to me, I don’t want you to catch what I have.”

I wasn’t worried.

When we reached the sidewalk a neighbor (whom he complains about in great detail) came down with her new dog. He stopped to chat. He wasn’t worried about his flu, his contagious illness, nor was he in a desperate hurry to get upstairs.

He moved. Yaaay.

Yeah.

And This One was Wearing His Bathrobe

This stuff simply cannot be made up or exaggerated!

This little encounter with a prospective tenant had two parts: the first included Bathrobe Dude at my front door; the second part was seen by a neighbor, which confirmed my "O Hell No!" assessment.

First flag

Bathrobe Dude, knocked on my door and asked: “Do you do Section 8?” (Section 8 is subsidized housing.)

Me: “Yes, but I don’t have any available units.”

Bathrobe Dude ignored my reply and began rambling about another tenant, a party a few years ago, yadda yadda.

Me, referring to his friend: “He’s not here.”

Bathrobe Dude: “Oh, he’s a fly-by-night.”

Me: “Huh?” The neighbor is not ‘here,’ I happen to know that he is simply out.

Bathrobe Dude is now reciting the names of many local apartments, their managers and friends who live there. But he never asked details ABOUT these apartments, such as price, size, inclusions, and future availability. Yowzer, you are so not a choice candidate.

Second Flag

As he is rambling, I noticed that what I thought he was wearing, a long, military style coat was actually a bathrobe! I am not kidding, it is winter! He was wearing his bathrobe.

I give him credit, he almost carried it off: he wore a matching wool scarf, and the ‘coat’ was clean and neatly belted, but clearly it was NOT a coat. It did not have any buttons, nor cuffs, and it had a very plain fabric belt. It was a freaking bathrobe!

He asked for my card, I pointed to the number on the sign out front and bid him farewell.

Third Flag

My neighbor came down to see if we were safe. She had watched the man pace frantically back and forth in front of the building. She watched him walk up the stairs, knock on my door then peer through my window.

Wow! A sneaky Peeping Tom.

I thanked her and reassured her that he ain’t renting here.

Winter Storm Names 2013-14: What They Are and What They Mean

So in case you were wondering how these names were chosen, and why, these are the answers. I suppose the Latin class from Bozeman, Montana was a good choice as they must laugh at what we in the State of New Jersey call snow!

But we, who are suffering from Snow Fatigue, could use a laugh; and with Snow Storm Titan barreling our way, all we can do is hunker down and pray for Spring. Dang.

As for those scrambling for Ice Melt, forgedaboutit. Whenever a truckload of that stuff comes is, it is attacked liked a school of hungry piranhas: nothing but a wooden pallet left in mere minutes. I have about 400 lbs of that magic stuff literally behind a locked door. Last month, 150 lbs took a walk, it ain’t happening again.

Below is the list of 26 names that will be used this season, as well as background on each and a guide for names with multiple or difficult pronunciations.

And the Names (besides THOSE names) for all this White Stuff that has assaulted us are:

Atlas (AT-lus): From Greek mythology; on the losing side in the mythological war between the Titans and the Olympians, he was punished by Zeus by being forced to hold the sky on his shoulders.

Boreas (BOR-ee-us): Greek god of the cold north wind.

Cleon (CLEE-on): A Greek statesman and warrior.

Dion (DEE-on): Short for Dionysus; Greek god of wine and winemaking, among other things.

Electra: From Greek mythology; the princess of Argos.

Falco: Roman governor of Britannia (today Great Britain).

Gemini: From Greek mythology; two of the stars in the constellation Gemini are named for mythological twins, Castor and Pollux. Also, an air sign in astrology.

Hercules: From Greek mythology; the son of Zeus, famous for his strength.

Ion (EYE-on): From the Greek word meaning “going;” introduced into English in 1834.

Janus (JEY-nus): From Roman mythology; the god of beginnings and transitions. January was named for him.

Kronos (KROH-nus): From Greek mythology; the father of Zeus. His Roman name was Saturn.

Leon (LEE-on): The Greek word meaning "lion."

Maximus: The Latin word for “greatest” or “largest.”

Nika (NEE-ka): From Greek mythology; the goddess who personified winning or victory.

Orion (oh-RYE-un): From Greek mythology; a great hunter.

Pax (packs): Latin word for “peace.”

Quintus (KWIN-tuss): A common first name for ancient Romans, including Cicero’s younger brother.

Rex: Latin word for “king.”

(SEN-nick-uh): Roman philosopher and writer.

Titan (TIE-tan): From Greek mythology; one of the gods (the Titans) who ruled the Earth before the Olympians, led by Zeus, overthrew them.

Ulysses (you-LISS-ees): The Roman name for the hero of Homer’s epic, "The Odyssey."

Vulcan (VOL-can): From ancient Roman mythology; the god of fire.

Wiley (WHY-lee): A nickname meaning “wily” or “tricky” in Middle English (Note: there is no W in Greek or Latin).

Xenia (ZEEN-ya): An ancient Greek word signifying the concept of hospitality.

Yona (YOH-na): A word used in ancient India to designate a Greek person (the Greek letter Upsilon looks like a Y, but is the ancestor of the English letter U; the letter Y was incorporated into the Latin alphabet after Rome conquered Greece, but it was used to write words from Greek).

Zephyr (ZEF-fer): From Greek mythology; the god of the west wind.

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Note: Dion and Titan were names slightly shortened or modified. Cleon, Gemini, Ion, Nika, Pax, Seneca and Yona were names substituted into the list because the name submitted by the Bozeman students for each of those letters was either retired by the National Hurricane Center, had alternate meanings or were difficult for English-speakers to pronounce.

Credit for this page goes to www.weather.com