I give you a hint: the F might not stand for Fahrenheit, or even frozen!
This story is from emails between my cousin in much warmer California and myself over the winter storm Hercules, which was followed by the Artic Blast.
But my cousin, from California (a former native of Jersey) sent me this link, with much sympathy. It seems that there are people in the country crying because if is 50 degrees outside and a little breezy. Have a look, and laugh (and you readers from Moscow, you will really laugh):
The Kimmel report, well those people need MY reality check.
Many years ago, I lived in Denver, Colorado, and worked at the Denver Airport for a spell. The employees had to park several miles away, out on the prairie, then wait for a shuttle bus to come get them.
I was out there the night it hit minus 24, I don’t even know what the wind chill was, but coyotes were howling. Ice encrusted my old car, then a 1993 Hyundai Scoupe, with three squirrels under the hood. I say three squirrels as there was a chronic oil leak in one cylinder, so I can’t say it really worked.
Denver is a prairie, kinda like a high desert: really dry. As I was driving to work, the newscasters were complaining about the humidity, and OMG, the problems with their hair.
Now remember, I live in Jersey, humidity so thick you can slice it. I have dyslexic hair to begin with, but in Denver, I had only ONE bad hair day! Because the humidity is around 3. Yes 3. But that day, it hit 10!
R U kidding me?!
That's how I feel about those poor, pitiful creatures complaining about 50F.
It was minus 10!
And that wasn't bad enough. There were trash bags in front of the dumpster. Guess who had to go pick up? (And a princess dumped her trash on the ground and walked away. I corrected her. She replied, “Everyone else is doing it.”)
I was in jammies.
My locks were frozen.
Later the rude, nasty contractor needed a jump. Yeah, I made sure his crew knew they owed me big time.
My face was so numb, it was as if the dentist shot my whole jaw.
Dressing in layers is not enough: My ass froze thru my jeans.
I want to hit the lottery and just fly around the globe to wherever it is 70F+
This will make a blog.
I am going to build a bonfire now.
"I have dyslexic hair to begin with, but in Denver, I had only ONE bad hair day."
ReplyDeleteWish I had one bad hair day instead of only ONE misbehaving hair every day. Beanies don't cut the cold when there's only a little bit of genuine synthetic wool between bald and the elements.
Springtime is only 7 weeks, 2 days and 6 hours away.